Turning To A Zombie

zombie_girl_by_portohle-d5ung86

Days purposeless, lifeless

Nights sleepless, weep-less

Mind powerless, thinking-less

Heart feeling-less, emotionless

Eyes tear-less, fearless

A little brain making me alive

Turning to a Zombie, I survive

Those awake nights with tears

Have disappeared in fog

But still I stand filled with fears

With all the hollowness and less hope

I flow with the flow of life

A zombie walk on streets

He hunt people to survive

And I get my own meat to eat

Mind collapsed, fainted, wrecked

They hold secret of eternal life in it

Depression, pain and schizophrenic attacks

My forever friends no longer dwell

My life has possessed some weird days

A state between happiness and hell

A zombie life is indeed pleasant

Nothing to feel, Nothing to repent

Life is turning to a meaningless dream

Awareness-less, Search-less, direction-less

Praying , longing…… for pain, for screams

As Pain takes everything, gives everything, doubtless !

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“Go With The Flow” VS “The Positive Theory”

I was once talking to a friend. He told me a story.

He said I was once sitting with a friend and He asked me how is everything going ?

And I replied               ” Just going with the flow”.

He then replied          ” Only dead straws go with the flow”

That was thought provoking. I use to apply the same theory to my life. Whenever my heart pinches me, I don’t want this to happen to you. I used to tap it gently and said ‘”just go with the flow”.

Whenever there was some problem in my life, I used to say to myself  “just go with the flow”.

Whenever I feel depressed and broken and find no way out, I wanted things to get normal again, I put my head down and remind myself of “just go with the flow” thing.

Now I feel I was dead from inside and I never tried to wake up myself. my mind and heart were dead. And i had accepted that death of them I was living with dead inner self.

But now, at the age of almost 22, I feel it wrong. I was wrong in thinking about my future. I was wrong in thinking about what will happen to me next and why. I used to think whatever happens to me, I deserved it ! It was due to what I did in the past. But I was being negative !! I was hopeless !!

I noticed one of my friends. I have seen her being negative about so many things but she never thought negative about her future. She always says something good will happen to me, she never felt hopeless like me. Even she use to dream really big about her future life. And I have seen her every wish coming true. Even I feel it like a miracle. We use to make fun of her like she has a losers approach or something. She always said she don’t try but she wishes , and her wishes comes true. Trying with wishing will make it even better I guess !!

I have noticed so many people who apply just go with the flow theory in their life and do nothing , wish nothing and pray nothing for it. On the other hand, people doing nothing but thinking positive got success!

Once I read about the positive energy. They say whenever you think something about anything very much, It will eventually come to you. Like when you will think positively, all the positive energies of universe will collectively start trying to get that thing to you … and eventually that will come to you. And this is true. The same happens when you think negative about something. Our mind emits positive and negative rays as we think and these rays eventually become a cause to get that thing for us. There is some science involved in it. As many secrets of universe are yet to be revealed, it may be one of them.

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